If Malaysia is ever going to educate its youth about the true meaning of sex, and perhaps educate its adults via the infamous kursus kahwins about the true meaning of sex in marriage, what has to be in the syllabus is Eve Ensler's "The Vagina Monologues".
I listened to it over the weekend, after downloading it from Audible.com, and its was a shocking eye-opener. The topics covered in it were not particularly new to me (or should they be to any contemporary adult): the word "vagina" and its many forms (the part where Eve runs through the many, many, many names we give for "vagina" was perhaps the only funny part of the performance), violence against women, sex & marriage for women, lesbian love (apparently the only way many women experience orgasms), what it means for a woman to have an orgasm, cheating husbands or boyfriends -- so much to say, and she covers it all pretty well in 1 hour 45 minutes.
One interesting issue: the matter of female genital mutilation, commonly practiced in some Arab and African nations. In polite circles, its referred to as female circumcision, but in reality its not. In relative terms, if a man were to have as much removed from his penis as a woman has removed from her clitoris during the procedure, it would mean that circumcised men all over the world would be walking around with only half an organ.
Its a serious matter, and one that is discussed in great detail in the audio performance. Society and religion demands the procedure because the clitoris is seen as a tool for evil: women who are allowed to experience sexual pleasure in their clitoris will not be faithful to their husbands; the clitoris removed will allow a women to better control her sexual urges. Furthermore, women who suffer the procedure, are then subject to infections, loss of feeling, and even, in extreme cases, death. There is no good reason to do it, and yet its still done.
A classic example of how the gender powerplay is unreasonably tilted to men -- why should a women's sexual's organs be destroyed to control the urges that are often initiated by men?
I've often wondered how extensive is the practice here in Malaysia. I know my two sisters were circumcised, but to what the extent of the damage, or to the type of circumcision, i don't know. I've asked my mother about it once or twice, but the only response i got was a mumble. Enquiring minds would like to know, if anyone visiting this blog can share it with us: what's the extent and practice of female genital mutilation here in Malaysia? Is it founded on religion, or is it a general, religio-neutral practice? How much damage does the woman undergo to her sexual organs?
This is probably a stretch, but the possibility is obvious: does female genital mutilation have an impact on sex in a marriage? By extension, could this problem lead to other problems, potentially damaging to the relationship: sexual insecurity, sexual frustration?
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